Sunday 31 January 2010


Ladybug !  Ladybug !
   Fly away yon.
 Your houses are on fire.
And your children all gone.

Little did I know as a young child chanting the unchanged version of this nursery rhyme- that after I was married -all this would become true.

For some reason, I was thinking about how marriage is presented -and was- . It was presented, by society, as the union of two people for their comfort and care for each other- and the nurturing of children. Except- I never "bought" the idea. All through my early twenties, on my own- apartment, car, pets, friends- job- ; I had a constant exposure to late night frantic knockings on my door- young women who had been at college with me, with 1-3 children- tiny children in tow- asking if they could stay the night- . And at work- mothers found- asking if they could come into the school to get warm- their husbands had thrown them out- in the cold- and their young sons would not let them in .

So- why did I marry ? I felt for my aging parents- they were of a generation that believed marriage was - "it" for a young woman- . They died not so long after- good thing. They were decent to me-and I was not abused- .I believe they would have been horrified if they had known -known that the young man they thought was decent- was absolutely- NOT.

Even after he left- he wouldn't. More than 35 years later - he still crawls around- he is on his third marriage.
I married a second time - to 1.) keep him away (didn't work) 2. Was pregnant- even though doctors had told me I never could again - and 3. in order to remain on the property my parents had left me- I had to have -a male around. No. 1 talked all around the rural area- how I was a drunk and a loose woman- (neither correct) and- I had a young child to protect as well as myself. His talking brought every creep to my door. The police were constantly coming. Then a baby on the way to protect. Couldn't help anyone else -if I was- destroyed.

So- no2 got together with no 1- .Number 2 was a wife beater and a child rapist- and practised bestiality. What does that make the first- ? At the very least- accessory to crimes.

So- now there are no husbands , and no children and no properties-that I could have left my children. And- the children are gone- in varying degrees- into that nether land of- psychosis and Stockholm Syndrome and- just like the abuser said- Mummy is a bitch - land.

Every non-abusing mother I have met in person or via the Internet- all- who have lost custody- as I did -of the two most victimized/abused -we are ALL "crazy" or bitches-. Now- what is it about marriage that (apparently-) changes decent intelligent non abusing working women/mothers -into instant "bitches" the second they indicate they don't like being beaten up. experiencing attempted murder, dragging their raped children to doctors and police- etc. Finding pets dead because of bestiality. Why weren';t we all told- that this was what marriage is ???? What is this huge cover-up? What purpose does it serve ? To produce more- screwed up twisted up- psychotic individuals ? Some of whom like to set houses and barns on fire ?

Well- I don't comprehend it. And will never. So- I will stick to a -somewhat reclusive life- and care for lost animals as best I can.

My name is  Ladybug.

Saturday 30 January 2010

Ethics and Ethos - IF

 If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;

If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise:

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master,
If you can think -and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
And treat those two impostors just the same;
If you can bear to speak the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with worn-out tools:

If you can make one heap  of all your winnings
And risk it all on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breathe a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long  after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on !"

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch,
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run,
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a Man, my son !

Rudyard Kipling (1865 - 1936)

Those eloquent words expressed the ethos or spiritual/ethical way in which Kipling chose to govern his life. A moral and ethical/spiritual set of "rules" by which to live. I found this on a site for ethics training for business and professionals. Perhaps all involved in any way with a family court- should be required to undergo serious training in ethics.

I offer my x husband's version of IF - words he spat out as he beat me to the floor- with his fists. And punctuated with kicks from his workboots- as I was prone-

"If you ever try to leave me you goddammed fucking bitch, I'll get your first husband to help me and he is so poisonous about you that between us, we'll get the children away from you." 

                          Which they proceeded to do- and also as a result, I lost all the properties I was paying for- to have something material to leave my children-And became homeless.                       

I find a rather stark contrast between the ethics practised by many men- and the - ethos- or-rather- vast void of ethics found in men like this- including the ones who repeatedly write hate against women- .They sound like my x !!!!  He was an extreme abuser of women and children- the first was a manipulative being- a very twisted person- who appeared- to some- as -conservative-and "okay. " Only some. Many did not find him -"balanced".That one left for another- who is now gone from him-also. Both sued for child custody. When the first x lost- he left the courthouse- cursing outside and saying" She slept with the #%^&*&#  judge"
 (As reported to me by a person who was outside on the steps- and was disturbed by what was heard)

I think protective and non-abusing mothers who have lost custody of their children -especially to abusers/child abusers- will find much that speaks to them, in Kipling's poem.

Monday 25 January 2010

Welcome to Forvik

Welcome to Forvik

Didn't expect to smile or laugh today- the news of a mother who killed herself- stirred too many ugly memories. BUT- this is hopeful- . Mothers can move there ! Flee from abuse with their children ! Maybe we can find our own islands- plural- as there are thousands of us - there could be : Corvik (Canada) or Noravik(N.Americans) , Belvik, Fravik, UKavik, Ausavik, etc.

Think I need a flag and t-shirts from this country- really.

Friday 22 January 2010

A Canadian pull string talking doll and Haitian Children

Well now, at a recent trip to a Walmart store, I paused in front of a sale of dolls- among them-those dolls that have a string through the back of the neck. When the string is pulled, pre-recorded messages come out. Some, one can even pre-record your own message,

When I came home and put on the news, the announcer was passing on the information that scores of Haitian children are disappearing. However, when checking the Internet, a certain (female) columnist in the West of Canada (B.K.) had yet another of those tiringly inane columns- not about children or Haiti- but- mouthing the same old paranoic drivel about all the feminists out there being nasty to all the nice men. I always marvel at how a newspaper could put this stuff out- and then- it hit me !

They are expanding into the talking doll market, in conjunction with the robotics industry- and test running their first clumsy attempt at an artificial intelligence robot !

Pre record some nonsense or other- pull the string- and see if the robot can type it out ! NOW , finally , I comprehend. I am not rushing out to buy stocks in their company, though. There are so many rival pull string dolls out there- some male- some female-

Tuesday 19 January 2010

Custody Crisis: Why Moms Are Punished in Court |

Custody Crisis: Why Moms Are Punished in Court

This is a very important article on how abused children are given in custody to their abusers/rapists.
It happens- over and over and over. The public doesn't seem to realize- or perhaps, does not WANT to realize that this scenario plays out in divorce courts all over North America. There are numerous Canadian cases. I wonder if any governments will wake up and realize the human rights abuses and destruction that they are , in effect, by their inaction, promoting.

Facebook: le groupe de la honte - Digital - Excite France

Facebook: le groupe de la honte - Digital - Excite France

A Facebook group is pushing the "joys" of pedophilia- . This article also mentions a group in Australia-
Some will need to use a Google translator on this one-. Interesting- I heard a while back that a Quebec province professor -in psychology- at a large university- a known pro-pedophiliac -was in Europe , promoting his ideas-which are essentially, he thinks child sexual abuse is just fine.

A strong message to the Family Courts and Fathers lobby Groups « Mothers Justice- Initiative Project

A strong message to the Family Courts and Fathers lobby Groups « Mothers Justice- Initiative Project

This should be clear enough- Sadly, those who need to comprehend it the most- will either never read it- and/or not believe it and/or attack the words. the ideas or the author. Remeber- it is abusers who attack- . Thinking people- well, think about an opinion- .Thinking people research on their own.Observant people read/hear the news., and know instinctively that this article repeats truths.

The Leadership Council - 8 Myths About Child Sexual Abuse

The Leadership Council - 8 Myths About Child Sexual Abuse

This is a fine organization

Ex-altar boys to sue diocese - The Sudbury Star - Ontario, CA

Ex-altar boys to sue diocese - The Sudbury Star - Ontario, CA

GOOD. The more are able to stand up and speak and ACT- the better. Coaches, priests, ministers and fathers- ALL are sexual predators and abusers and our "culture" needs to recognize this and try to expose these criminals . There is no use whining about drug addictions, alcohol addictions, depressed individuals, children who re-enact some aspects of their abuses when older etc, unless the source of their misery is exposed. And yes- most aggressors are male. That's just a well known fact. It does NOT mean that all (for example) women are against men- just as these realistic survivors- all male- are not against all men, either. All  non-aggressors are against AGGRESSORS.  The lawyer(s) must be excellent people, too. So many are afraid to take on cases like this. For sure- if they "win" they will get paid- but- they need to eat also - -!  Excellent news all around- for all abused children.

Monday 18 January 2010

Ardrey’s The Territorial Imperative Argues That Humans Are Naturally Territorial: Salem on History

Ardrey’s The Territorial Imperative Argues That Humans Are Naturally Territorial: Salem on History

This book was with me for years- until- it, with almost all the rest of my property was lost- in a divorce from a predator-. Or- lost to the vultures and hyenas that follwed-. It applies- I beleve, to human behavior-and particularly in the arena of divorce. Joint custody and fighting for territorial "rights" is how I view the howling of some over joint custody and shared parenting. The principles of entitlement and ownership- . Cows,pets,wives and children are seen as property - by some males who are- shall we say- less evolved. When I think about "rich" people- example Donald Trump- they are successful hunters- ,so feel a need to - practice what becomes serial monogamy- but they ,being successful hunters, have no need to abuse, beat, kill and maim- their other property- ex-wife and children. Could it be, that the less successful males- not good hunters- have so little in terms of property/territory , that they resort to ownership (control) no matter what the method ?

This is how I view psychological ideas- just- ideas dreamed up by someone- to be: the mind-wanderings of unsuccessful males. And how they do howl- when they are called on their behaviour - - -and beat their chests - -.

Infanticide and killing of mothers-so much in the news-

Infanticide (zoology) - Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

I have known for years that mother bears must guard their offspring against adult males and especially against the father-. I have wondered for years WHY humans seem to want to remain oblivious to their past evolution/development. I think when a human father kills the mother of his children, and often, the children also, he is reverting to the dictates of his hardwired instincts that we all carry from our past- eons of time in the past.
So- those who kill their female companions- and/or their children- are -perhaps less evolved and unable to exist -co-exist with other humans in what we fondly and perhaps erroneously think is  our "civilized" society. Some are more- civilized than others !
Time has not allowed me to read every single word of the -Wiki texts- but, first glance shows me that I am not alone in this- observation about the behaviour of some human males-

Friday 8 January 2010

Ontario government apologizes for handling of sex abuse allegations

Ontario government apologizes for handling of sex abuse allegations

Let's hope they continue to monitor what is happening to ALL children- abuse by others- like- in the homes- by a known perpetrator. Abuses in foster care- like- the extreme (or is it ? ) Lee case in B.C.
Apologies accepted. Now DO something.Or - are you still waiting for thousands more destroyed lives ?